ABBOTT AND COSTELLO MEET THE GODFATHER

by Richard Nathan

 

I read somewhere, sometime, that Francis Ford Coppola had said that he didn't want to make any more GODFATHER films because he felt he'd already told the complete story - and the only thing left to tell would be "Abbott & Costello Meet The Godfather."

I always thought this would be a great idea.

Maybe it could start off with Fredo telling Don Corleone that he thought since Luca Brasi had been killed, it might be a good idea to hire Luca Stello as a substitute

Later, Bud and Lou might have this conversation:

 

                                                            BUD
                                    You know, these Italian gangsters have their 
                                    own way of speaking.  They use some very 
                                    strange expressions.

                                                            LOU
                                    Like what?

                                                            BUD

                                    For example, what would you say if I told you 
                                    that Luca Brasi sleep with the fishes.

                                                            LOU
                                    I'd say it's none of my business who Luca Brasi 
                                    sleeps with.

                                                            BUD
                                    Not, who - what!!!  He sleeps with the fishes.

                                                            LOU
                                    The fishes???  You mean those things that swim 
                                    around in the water?

                                                            BUD
                                    That's right.  Luca Brasi sleeps with the fishes.

                                                            LOU
                                    That's disgusting!

                                                            BUD
                                    Wait a minute....

                                                            LOU
                                    That's perverted!!!

                                                            BUD
                                    I don't mean he literally sleeps with the fishes.

                                                            LOU
                                    Hey, Bud, I'm a big boy.  I know when you say 
                                    someone sleeps with someone else, you don't 
                                    really mean they're sleeping.

                                                            BUD
                                    Let me tell you what I mean when I say Luca 
                                    Brasi is sleeping with the fishes.

                                                            LOU
                                    I don't want to know the details!  You can keep 
                                    your dirty stories to yourself!

                                                            BUD
                                    He's dead!

                                                            LOU
                                    What?

                                                            BUD
                                    Luca Brasi's dead.

                                                            LOU
                                    Well, I'm not surprised.

                                                            BUD
                                    Why not?

                                                            LOU
                                    He probably caught some disease sleeping with the 
                                    fishes.

 

2000 by Richard Nathan.  All rights reserved

The author grants all internet uses to print these scripts for their own, personal, non-commercial use.  No other use may be made without the author's permission.  Without limiting the foregoing, the plays may not be staged without the author's express  permission.

Send e-mail to the author at Richard-Nathan@att.net.

 

 

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